I'm defining a relapse here as a sub who came onto this site previously, left, and then signed up again. Like myself! I wanted to write a little something in case other subs (Doms) resonated with it.
1. Accept who you are
In BDSM terms I'm a switch, I have an extremely large list of kinks with varying levels of intensity and findom is one of them. For a while I thought I needed to be both Dom and sub in some capacity in each of those kinks. I was wrong. It was ok to be submissive here in findom and demonstrate my more dominant side when it came to other kinks. This allowed me to organize my kinks in my mind and understand that here I just want to serve. Part of that also included accepting who I am as a submissive into findom, and that it'd be easier to accept than reject who I am. That way I'd avoid continuing to relapse over and over again.
2. Define your own rules
This doesn't mean do what you want and not what a Dom wants. This doesn't mean your needs are more important than his because they aren't. It means you're upfront, honest and vocal about your limits, budget and anything else. Don't waste a Dom's time talking back and forth for you too finally reveal a deal breaker, have some respect for them and for yourself. Previously I wasn't as honest as I should've been. I was too eager to please that'd I'd assume tributing more than my budget meant my Dom would be happier, but that resulted in me feeling guilty and overextended. I wasn't upfront right away about what was super important to me in this fetish. Now I've made changes to my profile to be more specific, and when Dom's ask me what my budget and limits are I'm blatantly honest. If that pisses off a few so be it but it also means I'm not wasting anyone's time. Know your budget and respect it. Dom's will gladly take more if you let them, but understand you might be setting a new bar higher than you can achieve in the future. Consistency should be the key with findom, not how much you can tribute in a week or month.
3. It's really about them
This isn't something I fully understood until now. I thought I did previously on the site and it relates to #2 on this list. Be upfront so your Dom knows all they need to about you, and so you can focus on their needs and desires. Nowadays I'm truly focused on the Dom's wishes and wants and it makes it a lot easier having put everything up front beforehand or at the onset. My most calm kind of day now is simply asking "what can I do for you?".
4. Controversial-ish. Be aware of assholes and don't be afraid to back out
Not all Dom's are the same and not all take their job seriously or treat you the sub like they should. You will meet Doms who have differing viewpoints than you, different kinks, opposing goals and those are all fine. It takes a minute to find the right one. But sometimes you have someone who abuses your budget, doesn't respect it or your limits and often it's easier to step away from the situation, ideally respectfully (but I'm a millennial who likes the block button too often). I believe under the right circumstances you need to do what's right for you. See the last point below.
5. Mental health
I suffer from a broken family, depression, anxiety, self harm and suicidal thoughts. No one but me understands my pain and the work I've done to overcome life's obstacles, and that means sometimes the findom lifestyle isn't for me. But rather than walking away, because like #1 this is who I am, I need to step away from to time from certain parts of it. For example it helps to find a Dom who is aware of these things, who can respect your history and boundaries. I love degradation and humiliation but on days when life issues flare up and get really intense it only makes me feel worse. But having a Dom who respects that and can change their language to be less intense so I can still serve them and tribute is even more satisfying to me. Take time when you need it, regardless of whether a Dom wants to allow you to or not. Because personally you cannot serve a Dom if you're not able to keep yourself afloat.
Unfortunately (or let us be honest -- probably fortunately) the AI platform I'm using does not allow you to generate explicit sexual content, so some reading between the lines is required.
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Prompt: Create a story about Alexander the Great exploring a black hole located near Uranus, and after a long journey, receiving a tribute to his greatness. Include the statement "I'm going in!" and also describe the tribute in detail.
Settings: Temperature (0.95), Top P (1.0), Frequency Penalty (0.35), Presence Penalty (0.8)
AI Generated Response:
As Alexander the Great explored a black hole located near Uranus, he found himself travelling through an incredibly dark and foreboding space. The further he travelled, the more intense the darkness became. Suddenly, he emerged in a strange and wondrous place.
Before him was a swirling vortex of energy, and beyond that, a vast and infinite universe. As Alexander gazed upon this breathtaking sight, he realized that he had reached the very edge of the universe. He was filled with a sense of awe and wonder.
Suddenly, something caught his eye. Floating in the distance was a small planet, and on it was a magnificent palace. Alexander approached and found that the doors were opened for him. He entered and found himself in the presence of a humbled man.
The man greeted Alexander warmly and praised him for his accomplishments. He told Alexander that he was honoured to receive him and offered him a gift. The man presented Alexander with a golden orb, which shimmered brightly in the light.
Alexander was amazed by the orb's beauty and asked what it was for. The man replied that it was a tribute to Alexander's greatness, and that it would always remind him of the courage and bravery he had shown in exploring the black hole near Uranus. Alexander accepted the orb with confidence.
He then proclaimed loudly: "I'm going in!" With that, he grasped the orb tightly and plunged into the swirling vortex of energy. As he did so, he could feel its power coursing through him. He knew that he had accomplished something truly great.
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Seems like AI's are coming along quite nicely (https://www.ownedfags.com/newsfeed/308717?ft=site). More adventures to come, as there is a lot of exploration to be had.
The Hierarchy Podcast is an analysis of the gay BDSM community, although it has to be said that little Sammy boy doesn't always think too highly of our little kingdom within that world. He does however speak about the different qualities he perceives in different Alphas.
I guess I'm wondering what you all think, and if there are other Podcasts worth listening to
I bet you would love to see me as a NFT you dumb faggot pay me what you would buy a NFT for humiliate fags cashslave serve me for you will never even be able to about to my genius not even in the Meta verse you are a jpeg I am a png a king. Perfect in this world, well in any world because I am superior. The things you will do for a straight man like me no matter how much you’ll never get dick serving me. I am a Diamond in the rough. In this metaverse you found me doing my yoga stretching naked while my cock is talking to me about some other ideas. My balls are full and bouncing to spread my seed. I feel softly touching my cock taking control of my senses. I'll do one more stretch to loosen my hamstrings and give you some close viewing of my hairy hole first. I begin striking my cock back and forth you wish you could touch it but you never will. It's going to take me almost a minute before I'm finished ejaculating. You say you never have seen a cock so huge in your life and I tell you that is because I am a diamond in the rough. My penis throbbing hard as I stare at you and you sweat and wish you could just get a taste. I tell you to stay back or else they're will be hell to pay. As I begin to climax on near my end you shake uncontrollably and don't know why I finish and you ask if you could lick the semen off the ground and I deny your request for you are a scum of the earth not worth to even be in my presence. I clean up my mess and I a god among you faggots men leave and have you begging for more.
Humanatm walletdrain $end paypiggy faggot
maleworship https://postimg.cc/zHvDXFn2/0372cc19
Since the start of the year we have updated our backend server and software bringing around a 5% performance increase, not much but every little helps, right?
We have also launched polls which will hopefully bring new game and interaction opportunity. The polls will be tweaked over the next week or so to bring a couple new additions and fixes.
Next we will be bringing an overhauled messaging experience, adding new features such as group chats.
After that has launched we will be going back over all the current site functionality to bring improvements and updates to these, providing additional features and fixes that have been asked for.
From around June we plan to start developing and adding Web3 features.
Owned Fags has always been at the front of innovation when it comes to findom and we have no intention of slipping behind.
Web3 and DeFi is no doubt the next technological revolution and we plan to fully embrace it. More on that coming later in the year.
As always, thank you for your support.
✌️
MoA
Whenever you enter the findom world, a lot of things seem so direct and strict. Like if no money is around nothing is aroung.
Entering the findom world is a way of understanding the dynamics of power, and how submission and domination is what makes the earth do rounds.
When a dom has no sub, is like a planet missing his sun to make the moves, it stills exists, it's strong in it's essence, but the lack of light makess it really cold.
In findom, more than anything, what makes the world goes round are the subs: without them, doms are just animals within cages.
It wasn’t recent, it happened a couple of months ago. We’d developed a strong relationship that transcended findom and kink. It moved beyond the traditional understanding of that relationship, and was a friendship. I think we became a part of each other’s lives - we discussed things (often without detail, and sometimes fudging the truth) happening in our lives. We followed each other’s story over the course of months as major changes happened. We shared things with each other about the scene, about the people, about things we found ridiculous, we found funny, we found hot.
It was the first time I found a true connection with a sub, and found someone I could communicate with in a real way. I learned a lot from him and discovered my strengths through his feedback.
He moved on. He left OwnedFags, decided to focus on his life outwith the kink. And that’s fine, it’s the circle of life.
I just didn’t expect that so far down the line, I’d miss him still. We need to prepare ourselves for the (sometimes) inevitable truth that our relationships might not last as long as we like. I debated for a long time speaking about it, wondered if it was silly - the man’s not dead, I just don’t have a forwarding address.
Let’s be more open about what our subs mean to us. There’s a lot of bravado, a lot of wariness about being close to the people we speak to on an often daily basis, but they form such a large part of who we are here - the ‘us’ that we cultivate. How can we not miss them when they go?
Just some reflections (aided by gin, admittedly).
Hello Sirs and fags
Happy new year to everyone.
Around Christmas'21, I got diagnosed with covid. I had to be hospitalized for almost 10 days and was in the ICU for 2 days. My finances are in a wreck because of it and I'm in massive medical debt.
Because of that, I'll be unable to participate in any financial activities here for the next 2-3 months until I can clear off the debt. I'll be active here but mostly as a passive observer.
Please stay safe and stay indoors. COVID is no joke. I'm all right now but I can still feel the aftereffect.
After a number of years in the FinDom scene I find myself feeling
lost. I have gained much experience over the years and like to think I can spot
the people to avoid vs the people who are worth exploring something with. I
have served a number of Masters, both long term and short term and have found
those experiences enjoyable and fulfilling for the most part. In most recent
times however, I do not seem to be able to stick to one thing or one person. I
have talked to Masters who seem compatible, engaged, tributed, and then lost
interest very quickly. This must be frustrating for Masters, but it is just as frustrating
for me especially as I do not really understand what is happening.
Of course, this could be connected to other things. The
current upheaval brought about by Covid for example or something else lurking in
my subconscious.
I wonder if anyone else has experienced this kind of shift
in behaviour and how they dealt with it.
Does it pass or has it become a more permanent state?
Owned Fags is a male only site which deals with adult themes
You should only view this site if you are over the age of 18, male and are not easily offended.
