User blogs

What makes a good FINDOM fag/slave/sub? - "Money vs Sacrifice"
Posted by SoS

As a sub to men for some 35 years, and a cashfag for 21 years, i felt it may be helpful for some subs here (and Masters) to have my thoughts on what it is to be a 'good sub/slave/fag'. You may disagree with some points, or have other views, but this is simply my own view, which is widely shared across the BDSM community.

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There are some basic elements of what makes a good sub.

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* Subordination (awareness and practice of it)
* Obedience (to the one you trust and serve)

* Respect
* Humility (accepting mistakes and errors, willing to apologise)
* Putting the Alpha's desires first 

A fag will often approach an Alpha with a list of expectations and requirements. This is the opposite of what it means to be a good sub. The instinct of a sub is a wish to please and satisfy the needs and desires of the man he is serving, before his own desires.

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Note that I don't mention tributes of money in the list, as this is secondary to the above. In findom, in it's real sense, tributing is a by-product of the above qualities. 

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What is Findom, and where does it fit into BDSM? 

Findom has many offshoots and vagaries, but this is how I understand the basic principles...
Findom is a curious thing. In the world where it is a sexualised practice, it is the opposite of how it is in the world outside of BDSM.

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'Findom' in the work place is a natural power exchange, where an employee is the financial subordinate of his employer. In the work place you will do as you are told, and do whatever the employer requires, because that is the way you get your wage, and hopefully, if you please him enough, you will receive a bonus. All the power is in the hands of the man who gives you money, and you will put up with all manner of things in order to avoid missing out on it. The more you please and are compliant to your boss, the more likely you are to get a bonus. You are the sub, and the Dom is the one giving you money. It is the manifestation of the saying 'money is power'. Money talks.

This scenario is obviously very familiar to all of us here.

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In the 'findom community', it is the opposite way around. The power play is not expressed by the Boss (Alpha) handing money to the employee (subordinate), but by the sub demonstrating his subordination and often obedience by handing over a tribute to the Alpha.
Be clear that in findom, a tribute is not a payment, but is simply a tribute, which expects nothing in return. If something is expected in return, such as time, cam, pics, vid or whatever else, then it is not a tribute, but a payment in return from what he has bought. In essence, this is not s********n, but a simple transaction. The Alpha may choose to spend time with the sub, do cam, send pics or whatever, in order to encourage the s********n and develop a bond, but that is because he chooses to. It is not part of a 'deal'.


A tribute is an expression of subordination and worship. A sacrifice made.  Nothing more and nothing less.

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On a simple level, a tribute is not pressured or demanded. It is freely offered and given.

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In a more advanced relationship, the power can extend to a deeper control of the sub's finances. FINDOM (financial domination) is just that in these cases, where an Alpha can extend his power to a control of spending in the sub's life, demanding when the sub hands over his money, and demanding when he is not allowed to. It can extend to moulding the sub's way of life by controlling what money is available to the sub. This is where Findom comes into it's own on a very powerful level, based on an enormous amount of trust on both sides.

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What about you?

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ONE VERY IMPORTANT THING for a sub to note is that the amount of tribute offered is of less importance than the level of sacrifice made. Some subs are deflated when they see other subs tributing large amounts to an Alpha. They look at the slave market and feel their efforts are wasted because they don't rank amongst the 'high flyers'. They feel they are 'useless' and bad subs. This couldn't be further from the truth.

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What the slave market doesn't tell you is how much sacrifice is made, how much the subs give up or go without, in order to hand over their tributes. Many of them have a much better income than you. In that regard, if you are making sacrifices in order to tribute, you are as good as those handing out large amounts of money, and you may be a better sub than some of the greater tributers if your sacrifices impact on your life.

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Money vs Sacrifice

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I make this comparison...A tribute of £10 from a poor student or sub with a low paid job who struggles to get by is greater than a £500 tribute from a wealthy sub who wouldn't miss it. Of course, there are many Alphas who prioritise levels of money obtained from subs, which is understandable. However, in the Findom BDSM world, it is not the amount of money, but your level of personal sacrifice that is important to a 'great' Findom Alpha. 


It is worth noting at this point that Findom is not an end in itself, but is a tool for expressing s********n in the BDSM environment

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A top quality Alpha/Master isn't concerned about the amount of money you can tribute. He is much more concerned about the level of sacrifice you make for him. 

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So... my point being, don't concern yourself with what others do. 

Focus on what you can do. 

Your s********n is between you and the Alpha you tribute. 

If you serve with humility, obedience, respect, subordination, making sacrifice, and worship the Alpha by putting his wishes before your own, you are amongst the greatest subs. 

Without these qualities, you are are nothing of a sub. 

With them, you are amongst the best, no matter how much or little you are able to tribute.

Rise Like a Phoenix
Posted by SnowFolf

Sometimes, everyone feels ashamed of themselves, be it something the desire, something they have done, something that is part of them, something they long to change or even wish had never happened.


While we often fail to discuss things like that seriously often dismissing them as a joke, the feeling of being ashamed everyone understands. Yet in a kink like this where perfectionism often comes out it is easy for those that are different to feel ashamed and try and hide.


Switches become ashamed of their 'other' side.

Those who may have bi tendencies become ashamed of the 'gay' side

Those who see themselves as too fat or too thin, become ashamed of their own bodies.


And then there are the deeper things people feel ashamed for, the things that have happened to them or are hidden from everyone.


Earlier I posted a reimbursement for something which, I will openly admit I wasn't sure if i should or not, I felt ashamed to do so because it showed I wasn't 'perfect' there was something wrong with me. Now at first glance, you may very well think there is nothing there that's unusual so why would you feel ashamed, however if you read the post fully you will understand that the reason for the shame is that we live in a world and are part of a community which often makes one feel everything has to be perfect.


And by posting that I have openly admitted that my body isn't perfect as it is broken .


Disabilities take many forms but ultimately those with them face the same reaction, "Something wrong with them" and pitted or even ridiculed for it.


But the reason i decided to post it was so that others felt they could be honest an open about things and know they aren't alone. All it takes is one person to do something unexpected to allow for change


and remember inside each of us there is a new version waiting to burst free like a phoenix from the ashes



https://www.ownedfags.com/reimbursements/688/railcard-never-be-ashamed-of-yourself
Life goals
Posted by Eblus

This is the fist time I write a blog post, let's see how it goes.

For those who don't know me well, I've been focusing this whole year on preparing some very important exams to become a public servant in Spain. Actually, I've been investing Findom money mostly to pay for academies and books, which are very expensive. I can't be thankful enough to all the subs that have helped me become smarter and more resourceful. I always say that's the domination I like, the one that allows us to become an elevated version of ourselves while enjoying the fun.

Today the results came back and turns out I've passed. As of today, I can officially say I'm a sexy public librarian. That's why I thought I should write to the community and say "thank you for helping me reach my life goal".

Ps: don't return your books late or you will be punished by me now 😈

The most serious mistakes that people who are tied to the findom ...
Posted by Olgg

Findom, short for financial domination, is a niche fetish where individuals derive pleasure or satisfaction from being financially controlled or dominated by another person. While it is important to acknowledge that different individuals may have different preferences and boundaries within the findom community, there are some potential mistakes or risks that people tied to findom may encounter. Here are a few:
1) Financial Irresponsibility: One common mistake is when individuals involved in findom fail to set clear financial boundaries or engage in reckless spending beyond their means. They may become financially unstable or accumulate debt, which can have serious long-term consequences for their overall well-being.
2) Lack of Consent and Boundaries: Consent and clear communication are crucial in any BDSM-related activity, including findom. It's essential for all parties involved to establish and respect boundaries, as well as agree upon limits and expectations. Failure to do so can lead to misunderstandings, emotional harm, or exploitation.
3) Financial Exploitation: Findom relationships should be consensual and based on trust. However, some individuals may take advantage of vulnerable individuals seeking financial domination and exploit them for personal gain. This can involve coercing or manipulating them into providing excessive financial support or engaging in activities they are not comfortable with.
4) Emotional Manipulation: Findom relationships often involve power dynamics, and in some cases, emotional manipulation can occur. Individuals may exploit the emotional vulnerability of those seeking financial domination, using tactics such as guilt, shame, or threats to control their behavior or extract more money. It is crucial to be aware of and avoid such manipulative tactics.
5) Privacy and Security Risks: Engaging in findom often involves sharing personal and financial information with others. There is a risk of this information being mishandled, leading to identity theft, fraud, or other privacy breaches. It's important to exercise caution and only share sensitive information with trusted individuals.
6) Psychological Impact: Findom can have psychological effects on both dominants and submissives. For some, the power dynamics and financial control can lead to a fulfilling and enjoyable experience. However, for others, it may result in feelings of guilt, shame, or anxiety. It's crucial to regularly assess one's emotional well-being and seek support if needed.
It is important to approach findom or any other fetish or kink activity with caution, respect, and open communication. It's advisable to educate oneself about the risks, establish clear boundaries, and ensure that all activities are consensual and mutually beneficial. Seeking guidance from reputable sources, joining supportive communities, or consulting with professionals experienced in BDSM dynamics can help individuals navigate the findom world in a safer and more fulfilling manner.

This is exactly what ChatGPT wrote, and he is right. What do you think about this issue? Write in the comments. Thank you all for your attention, take care and have a nice day
GET HORNY FROM U$ING FAGS?
Posted by SoS

Something i wonder about Masters is - who does actually get sexually aroused by receiving tributes from fags?

 Maybe you don't. But if you do, what is it about it that turns you on?

   

Which of these is You? 

There may be more than one that applies to You. 

You may have other reasons that aren't included here. Please mention them.


1. I get heavily sexually turned on by the power of it.

2. I get a bit sexually turned on by the power of it.  

3. I get sexually stimulated from being worshipped through cash, but not in a massive way.

4) I do it simply because I'm a superior Alpha. I get a buzz from it, but it's not sexual.

5) It's fun and I enjoy it, but it's just an interest I have. It's not sexual for me.

6) It's a way to make some money from fags, nothing more. 

Failed "dom".
Posted by fagface

My Skype chat with Dorian Gray Feb 15 2024

I told DG I wished to be released from his 'stable' as I have suffered a death of a freind and was away and offline for about 4 weeks. After informing him I was moving on, I recived this message from him.

 Feb 15th 

FF: "I've been gone for a few weeks. I wanted to let you know i have no interest in continuing this, as you have probably assumed. You are a very smart man, and a decent person but this isn't working for me as I imagined. I wish you nothing but happiness and success in your endeavors."


DG "  My point is: what does you telling me this serve to accomplish? Nothing. I do not benefit; only you do. It is selfish, and burdens my time with no upside.


I am pointing out your egotistical impulse to crawl back here just to tell me you're leaving... it is as futile as it is asinine. If you aren't pleasing me, you don't exist to me. All this little return has done is remind me that you do no exist.


Quiet old man: attempting wisdom for sake of your age suits you poorly. "


The only reason I post it here now as he claims to not "recall" this chat from Feb 15, and has blocked me. He is either a liar or brain damaged to not "recall" this. No actual Alpha Dom acts this way, at least in my book. Not if they want long term tributation. Good looks are only 10% of being an Alpha. The rest is Honor and Confidence.  I hope to find a real one eventually,

TPE. The first 12 months part 2 of 2
Posted by BS37SKINsfaggot

The first part of this blog was about establishing a true connection between BS37SKIN and his new faggot.    This part is going to be harder to write as it also includes the lows as well as the highs of the dynamic 


July.  

As the month progressed and we get closer to the next meet at the end of the month the VM’s changed. Gone was the friendly way BS37SKIN used  to speak to me.  It was about me serving and nothing else.   I found this so hard to deal with but stupidly said nothing about it.   I get to the morning I was meant to get the train over to see the Boss and very nearly didn’t go.  My soul was broken.  But decided if this was going to end I should at the very least go and do this in person.  BS37SKIN deserved my respect if nothing else.   The 4 hour train journey was hell.   All the thoughts going through my mind of what was going to happen.    The time came for me to meet my owner arrived.  We went into the hotel room and I just broke down.  Explaining how I felt with tears in my eyes.   (Just like now thinking about it).  To the full credit of BS37SKIN.  he let me say everything without interrupting me or getting angry with me.  And then he threw his arms around me and apologised for how things had turned over the last 3 weeks.   This apology was sincere and heartfelt.  We sat and talked everything through.  And then he said there would be no play that evening and we should go and get sone food.     To my utter surprise he took me to his place of work and another place which means a lot to him before taking me to his home for the evening.    We talked more.  And I was totally at ease.   


The one thing I would say at this point is communication is vital. Both for the Dom and the Sub.  We are not mind readers.  And the smallest of issues can grow into someone far bigger if we are not careful.   


The rest of my week with BS37SKIN could not have been more perfect.  We talked lots.  And I got to serve lots too.   And I got to shower him in gifts for his birthday including all 3 new Rugby Shirts which he had said I would pay for when we first started all this.  


August.  

The month started off with me sinking in mood.  Not because of anything my owner had done.  But after having the best week of my life, the realisation I would have to wait until November to see him again.  

Try as I did.  I couldn’t snap out of this dark feeling I was living.  I eventually told BS37SKIN what the issue was and as always he was very supportive.   The long period I had to wait was purely down to both of us having a busy few months ahead.   I had already been given permission to go away for a week with an old friend which helped and that was all booked in.  At the end of August I joined an amazing site (this one) which has helped me through the darkest of days and also brought me so much joy and peace.   


September.  

3 weeks of the month we’re going to be hard.  1 weeks holiday for me followed directly by 2 weeks holiday for BS37SKIN. Because  of this the contact reduced dramatically.  But I had my instructions for each day and I was getting by.  (Just).  I was starting to make new “friends” on here too.   And this is where I made the biggest mistake of my owned life.  I am not going to go into detail but at a time where BS37SKIN needed my total and utter support the most,  I fucked up. I let him down.  Although my mistake was entirely innocent, I accept it was a mistake I should not have made.  TPE is exactly that. I should have asked permission before I agreed to do something, and I know now, he would not have given permission, for my own good.  Not to be hard on me, but because he really cares about his property.  I will never forget this, and the impact it had on both BS37SKIN and on me. I  am still paying the price for this.  Desperately trying to build up the trust he once had in me. 


October.  

I was in a bad place. I’d made the biggest error in judgement and was now paying the price. Being owned fully is not easy as I said in part 1.  It takes real commitment on both sides.  I knew I had to prove myself all over again.  Only this time it was going to so much harder for both of us.  The meeting in November was put on hold.  Which I fully expected and did not push for.  This was now the time to show BS37SKIN my commitment to him is 100% true and real.  It’s so true what they say.  You don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone.  Now was not the time to be his faggot but a loyal friend.  To show him I fully understand his decision and accept where we are.  Did I cry?  Only every day, but didn’t tell BS37SKIN.  It was not appropriate to do so. Manipulation is not my thing and never will be.   


November 

We agreed to slowly get things back on track and meet as planned.   The conversation in the car back to mine was hard. Taking through my errors all the time.  I had no option but to accept this.  seeing how much I had let down the one man I love unconditionally and this almost broke me. 


I swear the gods were out to test me this weekend.  My owner got some bad news when he was with me which again challenged our very existence as a Boss and his faggot.   We talked it through over some very good port in London and went to on a tour of something I had booked for BS37SKIN months ago  then went back for more port and sorted things out.  


December. 

What a rollercoaster of a month.  Real highs and lows of the dynamic and being ferociously honest sone of the lows were all in my head looking back.  I am always saying how amazing BS37SKIN is.  And he is.  He really is, However. He makes mistakes too.  And he is the fist to admit it. Not just to me but he has said as much on this site.   This  shows he is human too.  Even the most perfect owner can forget things and although to me he is my king and a worship him unconditionally, I also have to remember he is human.  The life outside of this dynamic also has to take front and centre.  We can’t always be there for each other. But we are when it counts the most.  Yes.  He is a far better person than I am most of the time.I don’t mean in a D/s way.  He just is.  I am learning to be a better person and a better sub with his help and guidance.    Over the last 6 months I have learnt so much about him as a person and I hope I am learning to be a better faggot for him too.  Ultimately that’s all I ever wanted to be.  A good friend to him and his number 1 faggot which I have last that title and really want it back. 


As we enter a new year and this is day 365 of true TPE for me.  Let’s all take a moment to reflect on 2023 and see how we can build better connections and keep working at the lows to make them more positive.    


A true TPE whilst is rewarding for both the Dom and the sub is not an easy path for either party.  It takes real commitment and communication to make this work.  This has been one hell of a year.  If I didn’t experience some of the lows then I would not appreciate the rest of the time.  I hope to learn from my mistakes and make less of them.  I’m not going to say I won’t make any in the future, because I’m also human.  I have feelings and I know that sometimes I make the wrong decisions based on feelings and not facts.  


Throughout the last 2 months I have found owned fags to be a secure place to talk with others (both Doms and Subs without being judged.  Made sone good connections along the way.  The important thing for me is, they guys on here have supported me through my darkest of days without them realising.  The Lazy Lounge is a great place to go to for a natter and some light hearted fun whilst always being respectful to everyone in there.  I mean.  It would reflect so badly on BS37SKIN if I was anything but respectful.   MOA has created an outstanding place to be, a great community where we can all be who we are. (Even if the bogs do stink).  I am always open to suggestions on how to become a better faggot. And also if anyone ever feels low and just needs an ear or wants to talk through their lows in this crazy but beautiful world we share.  


Please. Everyone, take the time to ask once in while how your Dom or Sub Is feeling.  Make sure everything is ok.   Even that question can be enough sometimes to show you care.  This can be a ferocious world.   So showing you care is the most valuable advice I can give anyone.   


If you’re the sort of sub who gets upset and down easily.  Think very hard before entering into being owned.  It can be soul searching and hard at times.  Please reach out to the community if you need to.  It’s a good place to start.  X  


Thanks for reading this if you got this far.  


As always a very loyal and respectful faggot to his owner. BS37SKIN.  here is to a new year and more control exchange.   You really are my world.  




Update on instant pay-outs for Doms
Posted by MasterOfAll

Over the last few weeks I have been working on instant pay-outs for Doms.


As the new system gets closer to release I wanted to update you on how this new system will work.


- Doms will still only be able to cash out Tips that they have had for 4 weeks

- The minimum amount of Tips you can withdraw will be lowered to 500 (£50), this is down from 800 (£80)

- When you have completed the withdrawal the payment will be sent instantly, there will no longer be a monthly pay-out date

- Depending on what kind of account you're withdrawing to determines how long the payment may take to reach you:


Revolut account - instant

UK bank account - within 2 hours (usually instant)

An account outside the UK - up to 5 days


Although payments to accounts outside of the UK will take longer than with WISE, I think we can all agree this is still quicker and more convenient than one monthly pay-out.


In addition to the withdraw fee that the site takes, there will also be an additional transfer fee to cover my banking costs, as I get charged per transaction, however these fees are minimal:


Revolut account - no fee

UK bank account - 2 Tips (20p)

An account outside the UK - 30 Tips (£3)


Because of this I recommend that if you're using a UK or International account to build up Tips and put in one pay-out rather than many smaller ones to save on fees.


To help you understand better when your Tips will be available to withdraw and plan when to put in a request a new section will be added showing the dates that Tips will be available to withdraw.


In the coming weeks a select number of users will be asked to participate in testing of the new system, when the testing has completed the new system will be rolled out to all users.


Thank you for your patience.


MoA

A concise vademecum for new Masters
Posted by cynic

Fill in your profile, remembering to imbue it with superiority, and disdain for all life forms other than Masters. Please don't forget to mention that you don't need money but you want it because it rightly belongs to you only.

Post the compulsory middle finger photo. Better if you manage to get your feet in, and bonus points if you are doing something very dexterous with the other middle finger, such as spinning a basketball or peeling a pineapple (holding your phone doesn't count).

Boast that you are God or God-like or a second cousin once removed of Satan's.


Start messaging random slaves informing them that a new supernatural being is in their midst.


When you get messages, complimenting you on your appearance or on the words of wisdom contained in you profile, do not say thank-you but just answer asking for a tribute: now!

Get in a fight with another Master at the earliest opportunity to prove your masculinity and superiority but avoid turning it into a drama: only fags do drama.

Go into the chat room and make a statement which enforces the natural order, I don't know something like "fags don't have brains"... be creative. You are the brainbox. remember?


When you realise that there are far more Master than tributing slaves, try poaching one or two. Don't forget the Hollandaise sauce.


Set targets for random slaves... someone will be stupid or weak enough to accept it. And when they complete it, remember to never ever acknowledge it or - heaven forbid ! - thank them.

Play hot and cold with your slaves... ignore them or disappear for a while. It is guaranteed to drive them wild and make them loosen their purses' strings.

2022 Q1/Q2 update
Posted by MasterOfAll

Hi everyone,


This blog is a bit of an update on what you can expect for the last part of Q1 and going into Q2 of 2022.


There is quite a lot here so please come back to the blog if you do not have time to read it all now.


1) Adult material


I recently ran a poll on the site asking for your views on if adult material is essential to the site, and how people would feel if it was removed. The results were that about two thirds of people wouldn’t be bothered and one third of people felt it would damage their experience.


I have taken some time to think about these results and have also looked more into what the new UK laws coming into effect (Online Safety Bill 2022) would mean for the site.


Taking everything into account, I have decided that for the good of the site adult material WILL be removed in the coming months. Adult material WILL still be allowed to be shared via PM; we cannot have anything public though.


Removing adult material will mean we will not have to comply with the new age verification procedures, but also it will also mean other benefits outlined below.


2) Identity verification only for withdrawing Tips


Removal of adult material will mean users will not have to verify their identity to upload content as they currently do. Users will still need to complete these steps to withdraw Tips though in order to comply with money laundering laws.


3) New payment methods


Removal of adult material will open the site up to other payment method possibilities. One of the reasons we have so few at the moment is that a lot of payment providers will not work with adult sites, and those that do will take a huge cut and also put other restrictions on the site such as filtering certain words.


We will be partnering with REVOLUT in order to add further payment processing abilities to the site, these will include card payments, payments via REVOLUT pay, payments via Apple Pay and Google Pay.


REVOLUT will become our preferred payment provider for card payments as they only charge a 1% fee + 20p to process; as opposed to the almost 14% that Verotel currently charge us.


Having these MUCH cheaper processing fees means we can then lower other fees such as the Tip withdrawal fee. More on that in the coming months.


4) Less aggressive word filter


As stated before, not having adult material will release us from certain obligations, this will mean a less aggressive word filter, making for a better, more natural experience for all.


5) Site name change


The world has changed a lot since 2013 when the site was first set up, and honestly, not much thought was given to the name when it was. I understand (from people telling me) that ‘fag’ is not really a word that some people are comfortable with, and it has put some people off of joining.


We will be undergoing a name change and a soft re-launch of the site going into Q2. All user data and accounts will remain as they are, it is just the name that will be changing along with some new visual enhancements.


More information will be given closer to the rebrand.


These are the biggest changes to come and I feel they are a positive step for the site. More options, cheaper fees and a site more focused on Findom and Ownership than before.


Please provide your thoughts in the comments, I understand some people may not be happy with these changes, and that’s fine, but please be respectful and try to see the bigger picture before commenting.


I really believe that these changes will allow the site to grow bigger and faster than before and I am actually quite excited to see what possibilities are opened up by them.


MoA


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