10 Tips for subs New to OwnedFags from DorianTheAlpha's blog

10 Tips for subs New to OwnedFags

I recently wrote a similar piece for new Masters. 

This one is specifically for submissives new to the site. Read up & enjoy.

Feel free to DM if anything below is unclear.

If you approach Me inquiring about this article, I won’t presume you want to serve Me.

Note: some Alphas will disagree. Ultimately, submission is about serving your Alpha.

So do what they want first and foremost. This is simply a basic set of guidelines.

I’m well aware of the similarities to the Alpha version; it’s meant to be a converse piece.

1. Read the rules.

Read the website rules. Read about kink, about D/s ownership.

Read up on findom.

If your Alpha commands a kink or task you don’t know: ask about it. Learn about it.

Don’t play dumb. It’s see-through.

Everyone starts somewhere. You are born with the purpose to worship your Superiors.

Thrive in that purpose exuberantly, within the guidelines set for this community.

The only tribute allowed here are those sent with OwnedFags tips. No other tribute methods allowed. Period.

2. Do not waste time.

I almost put this first (but reading the rules is truly critical).

Simply put: don’t waste an Alpha’s time. Don’t waste anyone’s time.

Can Alphas be pushy or talkative too? Of course. That’s not an excuse.

It’s important to get to know each O/other. That’s not an excuse.

As a sub, the onus is on you to be useful and earn an Alpha’s presence. Always.

Send before speaking, even if only a beer (which represents 50 tips or £5).

If an Alpha reaches out, don’t drag on the conversation. Serve, or decline.

Here is a short list of common excuses that signal to an Alpha a sub is time wasting:

* Scared to serve because a past Alpha mistreated or manipulated them.

* Unsure how all this works, so needs you to explain every little spoon-fed detail.

* Leads the chat with their own desires, especially time-intensive ones like cam or real-time.

* Wishes they could serve, but has to ask their other Master offsite.

* Wants to get to know you, then after a short exchange, vanishes once time to serve.

* Would definitely tribute, except their jobless or a student, so don’t have the money.

Which leads quite naturally to:

3. Tribute. 99.9% of dynamics will require it.

There are Alphas who dominate without requiring tribute. It’s an extreme rarity.

More so, you should still be offering them gifts to show gratitude.

So tribute. Be useful. Be proactive. 

Every day, your sacrifice restarts. There is no entitlement. There is no earned credit.

Be clear what you can afford. Then push yourself to the very edge of that limit, for Him.

Findom is about power exchange through currency transfer. Much like bondage is through mobility transfer.

It's just another vector for a submissive to surrender to its Dominant, whether in session or lasting servitude.

For almost every Alpha —especially this website’s community— it’s essential.

Submission is sacrifice. Sacrifice hurts. That’s the point. And it’s clearest with tribute.

4. Communicate.

If tribute is the heart of submission, communication is the brain.

Have a request? Tell your Master.

Found a new limit? Tell Him.

Feeling regret, guilt, sadness, worry from sub drop? Share it.

Feeling horny, eager, masochistic, desperate? He will use it.

Not interested in an Alpha’s DM? Tell them by declining politely.

Do not ghost. Do not leave an Alpha on read. Be better.

Learn how your Alpha likes to be referred to. Use it.

Does He want certain words in ALL CAPS, or Capital Case, or $tylized perhaps?

Do the little things (on top of the fundementals).

I have yet to encounter an instance that cannot be solved with tribute and communication. 

Sometimes only one is needed. Often some combination of the two.

5. Respect every Alpha. That doesn’t mean be boring.

D/s is a simple acronym to portray that every Dominant is above any given sub.

As such, owned, new, seasoned, cynical, or otherwise: respect every Alpha.

That means be courteous in chat. Reply in DMs.

A simple “Sorry [Sir/Boss/Master/God] but I am not interested. Have a good day.” goes a long way. 

That doesn’t mean you always have to tiptoe around Alphas, or feel scared to engage.

Chat with Us. We may poke fun. We may taunt. That’s part of the D/s community.

It will teach you about the Alpha mind, and about yourself. 

An Alpha is usually more generous with an amusing slave than a vapid cunt.

6. There are many types of subs. Know what you are.

There are owned subs who live to serve their one true Master.

There are owned sluts who are loyal to a Master, but serve many.

The Master knows this, and sometimes even encourages it.

There are community/session whores who serve freely, to all.

Some subs like the games here. Others enjoy camming. Some love tasks.

Some subs fuck their Alphas non-stop. Some live at the glory hole.

Others are straight & married to women. Others are asexual.

Subs clean apartments. Subs get filmed tied up in dungeons.

Kink is a massive spectrum. For every sub, exists an Alpha.

If you’re completely new to BDSM, take a kink quiz online.

Once you know what you want, and what you are:

7. Express your wants & limits clearly.

Lasting submission begins with finding the right fit.

Many Alphas reach out to new slaves.

Verify your account.

Complete your profile.

If you just took the aforementioned quiz, post the results to your profile.

Add as much *concise* detail as possible. No one wants to read a brick of text.

Be clear about the type of Alpha or dynamic you enjoy.

Be clear about any limits, experience, and considerations you have.

If you’re stuck, go to the Slave Market and observe the top slaves’ profiles.

Do not copy them. 

Use them as a reference to construct your own original thoughts.

8. You will fail. Learn from it.

I’ve seen spectacular fuckups from subs.

And smaller day-to-day mistakes.

This might be an innocent hiccough, or a willful blunder.

Either way. To revisit #2, the best apology is said with tribute.

Then own your failure, and explain to your Alpha you know what went wrong.

Moreover, explain how you will improve, and grow.

Then commit to that growth, and do not repeat your mistake.

9. Building dynamics takes time.

For every Alpha you crave, there will be others that demand your servitude.

For every Alpha you serve, there will be others you crave.

For the Alpha who owns you, you may want to also serve others.

I cannot speak to numbers here. 

I’ve never discussed this with My subs to know how many Alphas reach out. 

It’s a part of being a useful sub. It’s appealing to other Alphas to see a slave serve its Master.

So, be useful, and be prepared for it to be noticed.

10. It isn't a competition.

It's easy to get caught up in the points. The Pantheon & slave market positions.

I've been guilty of it as an Alpha, as I'm sure many others are on both sides.

Submission (and domination) is about the intimacy & thrill of power exchange.

Finding the right Alpha for you isn’t just about W/who’s on top (pun intended).

Is success attractive? Obviously. Does it signal a certain experience? Generally.

Are those in the Pantheon top 25 on here regularly, and actively? Almost always.

Use points as a general indicator, not as an ultimate measure. 

I know lasting ownerships for Dominants who aren’t “famous” here.

And I know subs who serve sublimely but aren’t top of the slave market.

As much in finding your Alpha(s) as in measuring your own success serving them. 

If your Master is pleased, you will know. 

If your Master is displeased, you will definitely know.

Celebrate other subs’ serving Him well. That’s the point. Don’t be jealous.

Those are your beta brothers, serving your Alpha: his desires fulfilled.

That’s all that matters.

Obvious bonus: The reality is unique to you and your Alpha (and have fun).

This article is a general guideline: you should serve, obey, and listen to your Master(s).

As I’ve said: kink is vast. The same goes for ownership, session play, and everything in-between.

If you aren’t happy, tell your Alpha. If he is unhappy, do all you can to learn why (if unclear).

Then fix it. If it doesn’t work, He can remove you from His stable, or you can leave yourself.

Don’t delete your account. This place isn’t nearly as scary as it seems. It’s a beautiful community.

Stick around, and remember:

Submission is between you and Him. Everything else here is secondary.

This isn’t a place for friction or frustration. It’s about pleasure.

Finding pleasure in pleasing your Master.


Jul 9
Good insights here, Sir
Jul 9
One of the best posts I've ever read. Couldn't have put it any better. Well done!
Jul 9
This is brilliant, appreciate the time and effort, Nice one Dorian!!
Jul 9
Glad it's appreciated. Trimmed off a good 4-5 other points. Considering a part 2.
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